We’re
Teaching This:
Everyone loves a superhero. Superman.
Spiderman. Iron man. They swoop in and fight the bad guys, save the day, and
somehow make their spandex suit look cool all at the same time. What would you
do if you met one of these guys on the street? Pose for a selfie? Ask for an
autograph? Probably none of the above. Chances are you wouldn’t you wouldn’t
recognize Superman or Spiderman on the street.
Why? Because almost all superheroes have another side, their mild,
unassuming, simply-not-as-awesome alter ego. Sure the public persona is
amazing. But in their real, every-day life identity is rarely as impressive. In
that way, we all have something in common with superheroes. There’s a public
side of us. A super-identity that most of the world gets to see. We’re funny.
We have friends. We’re confident. But deep in our hearts, we know there’s an
alter ego—a less than super side that we’d rather hide away. As we take a
closer look at three personality traits that often bury themselves in our alter
egos, we find that God has something to say about each one that can free us
from living a double-life.
Session 1 Summary: No Worries (10/8)
What
do you worry about? Your looks? Reputation? Whether your parents will get you a
Chihuahua for your birthday? Everybody worries. We stress about our family,
school, future, friends, and about a million other things. Unfortunately, our
worries don’t seem to accomplish much. Think about it. Have you ever stressed
out about something so much it fixed itself? Probably not. But what’s the
alternative? The Apostle Paul had plenty to worry about .He had been
threatened, beaten, shipwrecked, and arrested, but he still found the courage
to say, “Do not be anxious about anything.” As we take a closer look at Paul’s
words, we find that God has given us an alternative. He has provided a way for
us to give away our worries and replace them with peace.
Session 2 Summary: Bad To The Bone (10/15)
Have you ever been so
embarrassed you wanted to run and hide? Probably so. Those moments sneak up on
all of us. Maybe you dropped your lunch in front of everyone at school or maybe
you tripped on the bleachers at a game. For a moment, it felt awful, but it was
temporary. The problem is many of us live with that feeling all the time. It
isn’t just because of a moment. It’s because of who we are. We feel like we’re
not as smart, not as cool, or just not as good as those around us. That feeling
is called shame, and just like embarrassment, shame makes us want to run away
from everyone, including God. The question we have to ask is, What are going to do with our shame? Are
we going to trust it? Hide behind it? ignore it? The writer of Hebrews tells us
there is a better way. Because of what Jesus did, we aren’t required to give in
to shame’s demands. And even when shame tells us to run and hide, Jesus tells
us to run toward Him.
Session 3 Summary: All About Me (10/22)
Lots
of things come naturally to us. Breathing. Eating. Sleeping till noon. And for
most of us, selfishness is on that list. As little kids we learn to yell, me first and that’s mine. Even though it’s natural, living selfishly doesn’t improve the quality
of life. In fact, it’s exhausting and lonely. Most of us would agree that
focusing on ourselves is a miserable way to live, but we still act selfishly anyway.
So how do we fight it? In a letter to some of the earliest Christians, the
Apostle Paul addresses that very question, and what he says may surprise you.
Spoiler alert—it’s not twenty-seven steps
to being less selfish. No, Paul gives one challenge. One idea that can
change the way you see everyone around you and help you escape the trap of
selfishness once and for all.
Think
About This:
What personal traits do you hope that you’ll pass on
to your teenager? Work ethic? Responsibility? A good attitude? We all have
parts of our own personalities that we hope and pray will surface one day in
our students. If we’re honest, we probably have a few traits that we’d rather
not pass along as well. In her article, “Help for Stressed Out Families”, author
Kara Powell explores one personality trait that we may accidentally pass on to
our students without even realizing it.
According to
the Stress in America study conducted by the American Psychological
Association, no parent is an island. Our own stress trickles, or in some
cases, gushes, through our family. Some of the most interesting (and may
I say personally convicting) findings include:
•
One-third of children surveyed between ages 8-17
believe their parent has been “always” or “often” worried or stressed out about
things during the past month.
•
Four in 10 children report feeling sad when their
parent is stressed or worried.
•
One-third of children (34 percent) say they know
their parent is worried or stressed out when they yell. Other signs of parental
stress perceived by children are arguing with other people in the house,
complaining or telling children about their problems and being too busy or not
having enough time to spend with them.
•
Nearly a third of children surveyed between ages
8-17 reported that in the past month, they experienced physical health symptoms
that are often associated with stress such as sleep problems, headaches, and an
upset stomach.
As disconcerting as
those findings are, something else bothers me more. The study also found
that parents are largely unaware of their kids’ stress levels.
http://stickyfaith.org/articles/help-for-stressed-out-families#sthash.j1R6lvfU.dpuf
http://stickyfaith.org/articles/help-for-stressed-out-families#sthash.j1R6lvfU.dpuf
When it comes to handling
just about every area of life, students take their cue from how they have seen
their parents react. That’s why stressed out parents can sometimes
unintentionally raise stressed out students. In the same way, parents who
struggle with anger, selfishness,
shame, or other difficulties
can likely pass those traits on without meaning to. No parent is perfect. We all have quirks, tendencies, and habits
that we wish we would go away. So what
can you do to ensure that your personal struggles don’t accidentally trickle
down to your student?
Share
the struggle. One way to help your student avoid certain habits is to be
honest (in an age-appropriate way) about the habits or tendencies that you wish
you could change. And, let your student
know how you’re working on it. Say something like, “Hey, I know that when I’m stressed out from work, I sometimes snap at
the people around me. I know that isn’t okay and I’m working on having better
boundaries so that work stress doesn’t become home stress.” Or maybe try
something like, “I know you saw me yell
at the cashier last week in anger. I’m really embarrassed that my temper was
out of control and it’s something I’m working on. I’m going apologize to her
when we buy groceries this week.”
Try
This
Think
about an aspect of your personality that you’d rather not pass on to your
student. It may be helpful to focus on one that most affects your teenager. Now
consider writing them a two or three sentence apology and leaving it in a place
where they will find it. Include how you are working on this area of your life.
Try to incorporate the following points as you write your apology:
·
Pinpoint
the struggle (anxiety, selfishness, anger, insecurity, stress, etc…)
·
Apologize
for the way you have seen it affect your teenager and/or your family.
For
example:
Dear ________. I’ve
noticed I have a tendency to act like my time is more important than everyone
else’s. I’ve been late too often to your game/recital/practice. That is really selfish and I’m sorry for how
it has affected you. Please know that I’m working on becoming a better manager
of time by downloading a calendaring app on my phone and scheduling reminders
to help me leave on time.
